My little baby went to preschool today. Yes, I know, it is just preschool, but it is a big step for her and a HUGE change for our family. She was THRILLED and excited and nervous and bubbly and sparkly and funny and all the things that make Maggie so wonderful. We had talked about it a LOT and thankfully she had a sense of the school and the teacher as both Henry and Frances went there. The school also did a GREAT job of having lots of "Meet and Greets" over the last week. Grandma got her a brand new dress and "lovely" shoes and she was ready. She woke up and the first thing she said was "Can I wear my dress now"....definitely a TAD different than H and F. She was buzzing all am....but also didn't want to leave my side. That said, she got there and jumped in. Immediately asked a girl if she wanted to have lunch together and off she went.
I, on the other hand, kept it together until out of viewing range and then promptly LOST IT. Like - HOT MESS LOSE IT. I cried the whole way to the car. Mark was stunned. I couldn't stop, I wanted to go back in and get her and told Mark that perhaps Home Schooling was a better option. Thankfully, I had taken the day off of work in fear this would happen and I went for a long, hilly run and - no joke - cried the whole way.
And here is why.....my whole life as a parent I haven't worked on Fridays and parts of Mondays. With the exception of an occasional business trip, those have been my sacred alone days with my kiddos - always with one (my kids went to preschool when the new baby came around). When the week at work was rough, when I felt like I wasn't getting enough time with them, I would hold on and say "only a couple more days" and then I get to be alone with them. That is now gone. I get it - they can play hooky, etc...but I honestly LOVED music class, running with the jogging stroller and my little buddy inside singing Laurie or watching Caillou, playdates, OMSI, and shopping with one little nugget. It was always bliss - always. Maybe a few rough moments, but usually a kick ass day.
Additionally, Maggie is just addictive -- especially right now. She lights up and room and she just makes you smile. She makes almost any moment better.
So, pity party over.
I picked her up and she was over the moon.
Her preschool is a magical place and she will thrive.
I know that I will see the benefits and joys and marvelous-ness of this new era...I am just transitioning....
This parenting thing...it is wonderfully humbling. I never knew so much love could exist in my heart.
Also humbling...the view from my pity party run....